Week 4 Review

 Hello League-Mates, and welcome to the Week 4 Review of the Fantasy Report with Carl!

I wanted to start out by saying, that yours truly, is no longer winless. In fact, I have catapulted into 8th place! So, all of the haters out there can choke on their haterade!!

Now that I have that out of the way, I want to let everyone know that this article may or may not be a rant. I have some facts thrown in there, but it's mostly fluff and filler to occupy your time for a few minutes. Not everything I write is going to be worthy of Pulitzer Prizes or some kind of blog award, but I do what I can to appease the masses. 

First, was everyone aware that Kory's team has exceeded projected point totals every week so far? Well now you know. Actually, it's not just Kory who has done this, Patrick, and Jenna have accomplished this too. 

 Second, teams are 1-1 this year in our league if the top scoring QB was started. Furthermore, teams that started a top 5 scoring QB this week went 1-2. Mind-blowing right? Maybe not, but I saw these stats and thought I'd make everyone aware. 

Third, I hate to do this, but I feel that I owe it to the league and the league-mate responsible for such a move. WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU THINKING DROPPING ALVIN KAMARA, IAN?!!?! At first I was delighted because I had this hope that no one looked at the waiver wire that morning and had seen what crime against Fantasy Football was committed. So, I placed my FAAB thinking it was smooth sailing. But then, I started to lose sleep, wondering who else had checked the waiver wire. I thought maybe Patrick, maybe Kory, quite possibly Johnny. But I wasn't worried too much about Johnny, I mean after all he was just demolishing people left and right, leaving in his wake shattered dreams, burned down homes, and starving puppies and children. Then Thursday morning came. I believe it was raining, and the air held strong with a sense of pessimism. Have any of you ever knew something really bad had happened but weren't quite sure what it was. That was me. I had some kind of ESP(N) that day. I was right. There in the league feed, "The Conntenders" winning Alvin Kamara. 

Now do not confuse my frustration for a hate of the FAAB. I love it. I hate that Johnny got Kamara, and I still don't know why no one dumped out all their FAAB for Kamara. I mean I did, but I was simply outbid. But we now have a 1927 New York Yankees Murderers' Row on our hands. So, with that being said, I offer a shiny new donkey to the one who brings down Johnny. 



I will be thinking of this moment in league-history for as long as I shall live. As a matter of fact, I have already begun to think of a way I can incorporate this moment into my best man speech at Ian's Wedding. 

With that, I am off to enjoy the rest of my week in Illinois, for this weekend I will be basking in the warm Florida sun, enjoying Simpsons Land and looking at all the dolphins and killer whales at Seaworld. 

I wish you all peace, love, and Fantasy Football prosperity. 

Sincerely, 

Carl 


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