Look It's A Mock Draft!

Good evening league-mates. This evening's Fantasy Report with Carl is a special one. 

To begin, I want to discuss for all you amateur ornithologist, the Mimus Polyglottos, or Mockingbird. It's quite a popular avian, for reasons that I'm not sure of. Maybe it's because of Harper Lee's novel, or the Eminem song. Or maybe even a popular Tik Tok that is floating around. Either way, it's name alone contains the reason for today's Fantasy Report. 

The second topic, which is definitely more fitting to our purpose today is the Mock Trial. Did you all know that Mock Trials date to 14th century Britian to help aspiring lawyers? Now you do. 

Now to the meat and potatoes of today's Fantasy Report: Our 2nd Annual Mock Draft, presented by Johnny, Patrick, and myself. 

PLEA

Round 1 - Johnny

1. Johnny -  Ja'Marr Chase

As the highest scoring non-Quarterback last year, Johnny will hope that level of dominance continues for this upcoming season. 

2. Jenna - Justin Jefferson

Jenna as a feeling Jefferson is due for a monstrous season with 2nd year quarterback J.J. McCarthy and proven track record of HC Kevin O'Connell. 

3. Juan - Saquon Barkley 

Juan sees that the two best receivers are off the board and decides to get the player who should have no shortage of red zone opportunities. 

4. Carl - Bijan Robinson

Carl is glad Bijan is sitting there at four and decides to take him, hoping he will reach his full potential this year. 

5. Emily - CeeDee Lamb 

Emily has no problem taking CeeDee here at pick five as she hopes Dak will lean on Lamb heavily as the Cowboys work through a little rebuild of sorts. 

6. Ian - Malik Nabers

Ian likes what Nabers was able to do as a rookie last year and hopes he takes another leap in his development becoming one of the best fantasy producers in football. 

7. Patrick - Jahmyr Gibbs

Patrick will be pretty happy with Gibbs falling to the 7th pick and has no issue taking a highly productive player in an offense that should still be very good, regardless of the Lions' off-season staff changes. 

8. John Sr - Amon-Ra St. Brown

John Sr. makes it back-to-back Lions picks with selection of St. Brown who will still remain Jared Goff's favorite target. 

9. Caleb - Brian Thomas Jr

Caleb takes the rookie standout who's propensity for big plays gives him hope that BTJ can be one of the best scoring fantasy producers this season. 

10. Shayna - Nico Collins

Shayna takes the breakaway artist Nico Collins and will hope the Texans offense takes a step forward this year. 

11. Kory - Puka Nacua

Kory will take by far the Rams' best offensive weapon in Nacua and hope for a big season from the 3rd year receiver. 

12. Kaleigh - A.J. Brown

Kaleigh takes the fifth straight receiver off the board in Brown and will hope that the Super Bowl hangover isn't real this year, instead continuing to be that steady big play threat. 

Round 2 - Carl 

1. Kaleigh - Ashton Jeanty 

Kaleigh is going balance her line up with Ashton Jeanty, who was drafted 6th overall by the Pete Carroll led Raiders. Rookies drafted in the top-10 have historically finished in the top-10 in Fantasy the year they were drafted. She will do all of this while taking a drag or two from her vape. 

2. Kory - De'Von Achane 

This is the high upside swing that Kory lives for. Achane is undersized, but his utilization in the passing game along with his 4.1 YPC gives Kory a feeling down under that is only rivaled by his 2014 selection of "B-MARSH!"

3. Shayna - Christian McCaffery

This is a no-brainer pick if Shayna can put aside McCaffery's injury history. In seasons that McCaffery played 16 games or more, McCaffery finished as the RB12, 2, 1, 2, & 1. 

4. Caleb - Josh Jacobs

There is a run on Running Backs now, and Caleb doesn't want to be left on the outside looking in. Green Bay showed that they don't have any issues leaning on a strong running game to open up the pass. It makes sense for Caleb, who wants to balance his roster early in the draft. Also, there aren't any Steelers in this range that would make sense for this Terrible Towel fan. 

5. John Sr. - Johnathon Taylor

John Sr. has a history on hitting big on his first two picks, and Taylor, if the stars align, could be a Top-5 running back. Also, he will smile and laugh at something clever that someone says as this pick goes on the board. 

6. Patrick - Drake London

Remember when I said that Kory will feel a certain way down under with his round 2 pick? Patrick will get so excited that he may not be able to say this pick to the sticker bitch. He may grab the table and fall to his knees and excuse himself to clean up. Think Dave Chappelle in Half-Baked. 

7. Ian - Brock Bowers 

The fact that Bowers fell this far is a shocker. Ian has shown in the past that he loves a high scoring tight end. Bowers checks that box. Sacrificing a RB or WR pick is justified with Bowers. 

8. Emily - Derrick Henry

Henry is about as solid as a Fantasy producer as China produces child labor. Emily will see amazing value this late in the second round for an RB who can easily finish in the top 5 due to an easy schedule for Baltimore. 

9. Carl - Trey McBride 

PPR is the name of the game, and McBride is a PPR machine! As the sticker bitch puts this on the board, I will be praying that this pick puts my team ahead enough to sit back and wait for a WR1. 

10. Juan - Bucky Irving

If all the cards fall right, and Tampa is as good as an offense as last year, Irving is a great addition to a Thunder and Lightning combo with Barkley. 

11. Jenna - Kyren Williams

This name sounds familiar to Jenna, and that because she's had him on her team in the past. To pair a goal line machine with Jefferson offers a great threat to anyone playing Jenna in any given week. Also, Jenna may or may not beginning to start doodling on her cheat sheet at this point in the draft. 

12. Johnny - Ladd McConkey

Johnny likes 'em young, and McConkey is as young as he can get at this point in the draft. He likes the PPR value here, and is looking forward to a quick pick in the third round. 

Round 3 - Patrick

1. Johnny - Chase Brown - After selecting back-to-back WRs to start his draft, Johnny rounds out his first three rounds by selecting the stud former Illini RB who dominated snaps for Cincinnati in the latter half of 2024. Although their defense might be one of the league’s worst, the Joe Burrow Bengals are a force on offense. 

2. Jenna - Jaxon Smith-Njigba - Lets be honest, Jenna saw this guy’s name on her sheet and thought, “What a fun name!” as she shouted her selection at the nearest sticker bitch. 

3. Juan - Breece Hall - Having played in many other leagues with Juan over the past half decade, I know that he loves him some RBs. Hall seems motivated to prove himself to his new coaching staff. 

4. Carl - Garrett Wilson - Carl gets the good fortune of mopping up the leftover WR1 that everyone else passed on. Wilson just got paid a large sum of money, especially considering he has only played three years in the league, and will now be catching passes from his former college teammate in Justin Fields. 

5. Emily - Josh Allen - Coming off of an MVP season, Emily is delighted to see Josh Allen still on the board nearly half way through the third round. She feels this is an easy selection to make. 

6. Ian - Lamar Jackson - Ian doesn't see any Packers within shouting distance on his draft sheet, so he's cool with taking the risk of passing on a RB to acquire the services of Lamar Jackson for a second straight year after he finished as QB1 in 2024.

7. Patrick - Jayden Daniels - I mean, come on, this guy was fantasy gold in his rookie season, where I landed him in the 11th round (no big deal 😏). I’m more than willing to pay the third-round price tag, betting that he will continue to ascend in his second year. 

8. John Sr. - James Cook - Cook wants a new contract, but Senior isn’t worried as he is tied to one of the league’s best offenses, and is coming off of an 18 TD season. The Bills didn’t add anything to their RB room, so opportunities to contribute should continue to be there for him. 

9. Caleb - Alvin Kamara - The Saints are in a transitional season with a new QB, new head coach, and a new scheme. Caleb doesn’t give a shit about any of that because, prior to missing the last three games of 2024, Kamara was RB5 in points per game. He thinks the 30 year old has one more workhorse season in him, particularly as a receiving threat in a full PPR format. 

10. Shayna - Tyreek Hill - Coming off of a down season, Shayna is a believer that Tyreek will be back to his old self in 2025. As far as upside is concerned, there are few players in this range that have a legitimate chance of leading the league in receiving yards. 

11. Kory - D’Andre Swift - Kory simply cannot pass up this opportunity to take the Bears lead RB in year one of the Ben Johnson experience. If the Bears can get better play out of Caleb Williams behind an improved O-line, it could be wheels up for Swift. 

12. Kaleigh - Davante Adams - Adams is now 32, but he proved last year that he still has plenty in the tank. Another top-12 season for Adams isn’t out of the question as he moves back to the west coast to enjoy the benefits of playing opposite of Puka Nacua. 

We wish you all Peace, Love, and Fantasy Football Prosperity.